After much debate I've decided to post it. I want my readers to not only love my brand, but know that I'm a real person at the end of the day. I constantly read posts about fru fru things and while people got serious to deal with the trouble in Japan, only a couple really dive into pain and troubles. Now, I won't make this a consistent thing, but I want to share it with you.
Hello Ms. Lady,
It must be weird getting a message from me. I'm 26 now. Lol...I know it's crazy, I'm still getting used to being "old". I wanted to write you this letter because I love you. I really do. I've lived your future and there's some things I wanted you to know.
-First and foremost, make amends with your Dad (stepdad). Your fall out hasn't happened yet but it will. You are already having resentment feelings toward him and before it snow balls, talk to him and be understanding. He's turned into a different person and even he is having a hard time with who he's become. I know you think you have time now, that you both just need a break, but time will run out before you have a chance to make things right. When you're my age, you'll regret holding on to the anger because when you look back on your past, the bad times will be faint memories and you'll really miss the good times.
-Jay (your brother) goes through a really hard time his senior year and into adulthood. Be there for him. You are the one he will call for. The one he needs and while it will be very hard for you, know it's a thousand times harder for him. Watch your words, in an anger filled moment one comment will change your relationship with him forever.
-The greatest gift you will receive is a sweet puppy. TRAIN HIM PROPERLY. If not, you won't open up your future homes to enjoy with other people.
-Cry more babe. You can still be strong for the family and cry. I know you think it's a weakness but if you learn to do it now you will be able to control your tears in the future.
-Follow your heart when it comes to men and relationships and you'll do just fine. I know you are afraid to let someone in and you are trying your best not to get hurt, but it's going to happen anyways. You can't control it. Follow your gut because it's actually God speaking to you. Walk away when it says walk away. It's okay to not believe in unconditional love right now but keep believing it may happen. You'll kiss a few toads, even fall in love with a few but the lessons you learn help you become the amazing woman you turn out to be.
-Be closer to God. Reading the bible and going to church may be a little nerdy for a teen but when you are laying in bed at night, trying not to cry, pretend your pillow is His chest and lean on Him. The man that you've been dreaming of...Prince Charming...He's been with you all along. Have conversations with Him and call on Him before you call your friends.
-People will make you second guess your dreams/career but like you always are, be true to yourself. The lessons you learn from dreaming and failing will help you discover you're true calling in life. Not many people can say they know their reason for living but you will.
-Don't analyze your premonitions and dreams so much. You'll spend a lot of time worrying and missing out on life because you are afraid of what you've already "seen".
-Make a point to get close to your sisters as much as you can. You only have 2 now but you'll get 2 more later and those relationships will mean more to you then you know now.
-Help Chase and him how to problem solve now. Yes he's your little brother but LET him put the last block on his Lego tower. Help him do things on his own. Your mom is going to have a hard time with him later. Helping him be a strong kid now will help make him a stronger man later. Get to know who he is so when he gets older so he'll trust you with his thoughts. Oh and extra lessons on how to look both ways before crossing a street will help. Trust me!
-Learn to save your money. You will grow into a big spender. The more money you have in the bank, the more frugal you become. I know it's weird but trust me, that's how you are. Protect your credit. You won't be able to pay all your bills on time but make it a priority to try.
-You and your mom's relationship will stand the test of time but don't change your course because she says so. Take care of her like you always have. She'll need it. You are going to go through a lot too and will need her. Her biggest insecurity is feeling like everyone wants something from her without having someone of her own to make her feel special. Words are great but actions speak louder. Do nice things for her.
-I know when you look in the mirror there are things you want to change about your body. You don't know it now but honey! That body is the shit!!! Boys like it now and men will want it later. Take your shirt off when you go to the pool. You are so very pretty. Freshmen 15 is real but you won't really gain weight until 24/25 (I'll have to write a letter to her telling her to get off the couch next.) Natural beauty is great but doesn't last always, continue to take care of yourself and your confidence.
-You have always been a leader but you unknowingly make the same decisions as your friends. You don't know it now but they aren't as they appear. You will try to live your life based on theirs and it just won't work. It holds you back. Trust yourself and make those random, Libra decisions you are comfortable with. God is going to bless you with great friends later in life anyway.
-Continue to hold on to your morals, our parents taught you well. And while I would say it might be easier for you to wait to have sex until you are out of high school, waiting until you are 18 is still a great goal.
Honestly though, you are going to go through a lot of changes, a lot of hard times, and a lot of lessons learned but you are a smart, strong woman and you will always come out on top. I know this letter was a little dark but there are so many fun times a head of you. Situations you will crack up about later with friends and family. Even though they don't teach you how to deal with the pitfalls of life in high school, they also don't prepare you for the awesomeness that is adulthood. Hold tight to your family, your morals and your faith. Other then that, enjoy life Kid! I'm very, very proud of the journey you are on and the storms you will endure.
Love always and forever,
Your 26 year old self
OH...p.s. You'll end up really liking tattoos, but when you go to get your first, second and third ones, please stay away from Chinese symbols and moons and stars.
Actually you know what? Don't worry about it. They aren't Looney Tune characters or black panthers so that's the silver lining. You're smart, you'll be ight'.